The Strange History of Port Charles, Way Before General Hospital began
by slapstick.genius
Summary: A tribute to Both The Simpsons and General Hospital as well as being the latter's really awkward, bloody prequel.
1. Bear Business

Port Charles was founded in 1750 by a multiracial teenager trekking through the woods. Her name was Wanda Benjamin Ryan. She and her fellow family members - who were all escaped slaves and evicted Amerindians from rival tribes - founded a suitable spot and stayed, even at the cost of a big American black bear attack, which explains why the original name of Port Charles was Black Bear Bay.

The Ryans were then joined by other families, many of whom are anti-slavery (but ironically pro-independence), such as certain members of the Springfields, the Wesleys and the Campbells.

As a well-befriended community, they had survived tornadoes and blizzards because - at their time - they were far away from Boston, New York or even Washington DC, combined into the busy BosWash area.

Wanda Ryan married the paternal grandson of Bavarian immigrants, Erick Springfield, in 1757, even though their relationship soured up so much by the time their youngest child and only son, Johannes Jebediah Springfield, was born in 1778. They then separated as their four daughters (Luca, Hani, Mina and Juno) left the house to make a fashion business before that.

Johannes Springfield was a sladdbarn, a fact that his mother shitted on, so he got abandoned by her and became alone as a seven year old. As he lived in the forest, he got picked up by a shy American black bear who lost her cubs and became feral as time went by. As a result, he got captured by Harold Shelbyville, but an unlikely relationship blossomed through time. At the same time, the Springfield Parents died.


	2. Shelbyville and Springfield separated

He and Harold, as well as their other friend Philip Westbourne, after years of walking through the Rockies, decided that they are searching for a suitable area near the Pacific Northwest, and they finally did. Later on, they founded out that the area, near the Pacific Northwest (most likely coastal Oregon), was a sacrificial site of native American importance. Their bundling neighbours decided to build a town around that area, even though Philip called that 'Grizzly Hill', because of the grizzly bears that lived there. Ta da! They built the oldest part of the Simpsons' hometown anyway.

But as Grizzly Hill grew faster than Port Charles (but still slowly) to include the first Burns family mansion and a milling plant, Harold left due to his disappointment, so he has to find an area south of the Grizzly Hill town, and he eventually did find it. As it turns out, the area was a prairie grassland - a highly important one to conserve! So he has to conserve much of it in order for his fellow neighbours to build a town around it. They called it 'Mudhole Heights', due to the marshy terrain.

Harold Shelbyville married a single neighbour of his named Rachel Thompson. Although imperfect as a couple, they pretty much lived a lot more happily than the parents of Johannes Springfield ever did. They adopted two orphans named Tommy and Teagan, both of whom were fraternal twins and lived fairly longer than the adoptive parents themselves.

Rachel and Harold died on August 14th 1827 of tuberculosis. Both were seventy seven years old.


	3. Black Bear Bay renamed

Johannes Springfield married a senior wife named Cushaw and had eight kids before turning 40 in 1818, while still living in Grizzly Hill.

Over a decade later, Black Bear Bay became a milling town far away, thanks to the brains and talent of a former slave from Richmond, Virginia, whose name was Gilbert Washington. Gilbert (born in and his wife Amelia - plus their two sons Terrance and Jack (born in 1808 and 1811) - settled down in Black Bear Bay, where they all founded the Washington Milling works in 1827.

While milling was surprisingly efficient and proven to be good news, the long term effects of the cultural woes perhaps caused the Washingtons to leave the town safely in 1834, just without an assassination or an assassination attempt by both the police and the criminals, who all feel disgusted anyway.

Although not its first mayor (that perhaps belonged to Gerald Campbell for a brief time in 1764!), soft-left wing Independent (mildly depressed multiracial) Jonathan Charles Morgan also helped his radical wife Selma to become one, to the cheer of the young proto suffragettes if not always everybody in the town. As a result, she slowly but surely changed the town's name from Black Bear Bay to Port Charles in honour of her long suffering, impatient husband.

They had only one child together, and it was a boy since they were latecomers in the parenting game. His name was Daniel Morgan, born at the same time the Washingtons left Port Charles when it was called Black Bear Bay.

After they left politics together due to a dwindling population of Independent voters, from 1841 to 1855 they and their fellow builders built the first Port Charles General hospital (bearing the whole show's eponymous name), in order to serve the lifelong abused and long term sick.


	4. Shady Brook and General Hospital created

The Port Charles General Hospital has changed many times before the whole show began. 1855 marked its opening to the public after 14 years of slow, dramatic construction. 1862 marked the first building's burndown on a fire, probably because of nitrate. The second building was a considerable improvement when it was opened in 1869, but like the first building, it got burned down in 1890 due to nitrate and various deadly materials. Both were possibly intended to harbour people with life threatening abuses and conditions.

The modest third building was a much bigger improvement than the first two and still sits quite distantly from both, even though it opened in 1890. Its original name fore the first 28 years was the Bloodlust Sanatorium and Hospital, until it got renamed simply as the Shady Brook Sanatorium when the North Carolina flu pandemic was spreading worldwide. Sitting distantly from Shady Brook Sanatorium was the much larger first General Hospital building on a different, built from 1904 to 1910 and opened in 1911.

The first Shady Brook Sanatorium caught a fire and burned down in flames in 1925, due to various chemicals including nitrate, as many of its original residents had died by then. The second and current Brook Sanatorium was built in 1939, but did not open to the public until America entered World War 2, while the first General Hospital got demolished at the same time because it hid a lot of toxic materials inside.

Twelve years later, the second and current General Hospital building was built from 1946 to 1952 and then opened to the public in 1953. Like the second Shady Brook Sanatorium, it sits on a rather different location ever since.


	5. How Shady Brook got modernised

From 1954 to 1959, a year after the current General Hospital's opening, The Shady Brook Sanatorium expanded with the construction of a psychiatric hospital sitting next to it. Named Shady Brook Psychiatric Hospital, it opened in 1960 to the delight of many mentally ill humans living in Port Charles.

Now better known than the Shady Brook Sanatorium, the Shady Brook Psychiatric Hospital was rated primarily positively by sympathisers, who praised it for its calm atmosphere but criticised it for its disheartening methods. Unlike the sanatorium, which is large, it is a small but spacious building.

Thankfully, many come and go, but it is primarily humans with the most disturbing family histories and the most glaring of evolutionary mechanisms gone awry who are the Shady Brook Psychiatric Hospital's permanent residents.


	6. After Johannes Springfield died

1834 was when both Cushaw and Johannes Springfield died of certain natural causes, perhaps a combination of smallpox and pneumonia. Declining from eight children, only the two youngest girls, who were both identical twins, survived adulthood. Their names were Ashley Scorpio (who married Italian immigrant Federico Scorpio at 24) and slightly older Jessamine Webber (who married Norbert Webber at 21).

Black haired Jessamine and Ashley were about 16 when their parents died, so they worked at home doing the dishes, dusting up the rooms and sorting other stuff alone. Years later, Jessamine - already having a bad relationship with previous boyfriends - left the house to do cabaret at the Aztec Theatre, which clearly was intended to be a cabaret theatre before currently turning into a cinema. It was at the Aztec Theatre that she found her best boyfriend ever, in the form of puppeteer Norbert Webber. They've been in a lengthy yet good but imperfect relationship ever since, even though they didn't even have kids until much later, when they adopted a baby boy named Tristan at the beginning of the American civil war. Tristan Webber, as the adopted son became, was not as well known as the Italo American-Australian Scorpios, but nonetheless popular with fellow cartoonists.

With the help of herself, Ashley was a talented chef at Federico Scorpio's family run Italian restaurant Vesuvius. Sometimes, Federico was sick and not there. Although estranged at the most part, Federico and Ashley were actually happier together with five children in tow. The children were named Thelma (second youngest), Angelo (oldest), Isabella (middle), Rogelio (second oldest) and George. When they retired, the youngest son George Scorpio ran the Vesuvius restaurant for forty nine years (with small breaks) because he really loved the job.


	7. The Scorpios

Two of his older siblings died at a young age, while the other two became spinsters, with the latter, a female, living up to 91 years. George was the only one who got married to a wife of his. Her name was Louise Jameson.

Louise bore him their only child, a boy named Bartholomew Milhouse. Bart Scorpio had a fun life as a young teenager, even though his parents bickered a lot. That was pretty much it, until he left the family behind in order to start a small budding business. A cunning entrepreneur, Bart founded the Scorpio's (which is now called Moe's) pub in small building on November the 16th 1893. He was born in September 10 1875.

He and an ally (slash his future wife), Lucia Aquino from Mexico, were avid fans of schnitzels and moderate amounts of handmade beer. People went out to drink the trendy handcrafted beers and ate lots of SCHNITZELS in conjunction with Marzipan! although popular with guests, Bart and Lucia could be quite mildly depressed. As a result, they left the pub, which was later run by a neighbour of Bart, Elmer Jose Luis Wiggum (who spoke a bit like Homer Simpson) and later his son, Joe Louis (who spoke like Goku).

Lucia and Bart owned a medium sized house, where their two sons Alexander (born 1900) and his younger brother Milhouse (born 1911) grew up. Lexi stayed in America and married a Texan colleague named Patricia Ronstadt, while Milhouse left America for Australia as a wary soldier in WW2. Trish and Lexi already had a growing son named Joey but (the latter) adopted a South Korean orphan - an infant girl - named Hana later on, when he was a colonel in the Korean war. Joey and Hana survived as good albeit imperfect childhood friends, later marrying each other in 1974.

Milhouse married future Sydneysider Juliet Mauboy, an Australian who was a part Aboriginal herself (who later campaigned for the rights of her fellow Aboriginals) in 1946. They birthed two sons, Robert and Mac, in 1950 and 1957 respectively. They died in a plane crash in 1974.


	8. After the Shelbyville founders died

When the founding Shelbyville parents got disappointed too much and died of old age, the town of Mudhole Heights became full of bland hicks and other nasty humans alike. As he grew older, Tommy Shelbyville became a lone, weed-smoking cowboy who rode his horse and married a maid named Sandy Wallace who also rode her horse. Both were childless.

His twin sister Teagan however, became a proto-feminist glamour icon, since she was supported by her husband Toby Wiggum and her eight children. But five of them didn't survive past puberty, even though the middle children, fraternal triplets named Robert Wiggum, Yvonne Hellman and Patricia 'Patty' Hardy (all born in May the 16th 1820) did.

As the youngest triplet, but the second to leave the house, - due to her tomboyishly flighty and boisterous nature - Patricia married fellow former part time robber Oswald Hardy in 1844. In 1855, they birthed fraternal twins in a derelict house, naming them Mitchell and Melvina. Their relationship with the twins was pretty bad, so they gave them away to Yvonne and Arsenal Hellman, who raised them as their own, with their then teenaged daughter Fea in tow. Many years later, they birthed Linda Hardy, who got fostered by Mrs and Ms Bloomsbury - with then young Bassom in tow.

Yvonne married her somewhat younger sweetheart, future long time Shelbyville resident and paper magnate Arsenal Hellman, the middle child of the Hellman brothers, in 1839. They birthed their only biological child Fea two years later, in 1841. Yvonne died in 1875, Arsenal in 1889.


	9. The Wiggums

Robert Wiggum married spitfire Magdalena Mendez and birthed Elmer Jose Luis Wiggum in 1848. Elmer married his teenage sweetheart Tessa Henson, who birthed their only child together, Joseph Louis Wiggum, in 1876. Joey met his plump, raspy ex-moll wife Martha Baldacchino and slowly fell in love together in the midst of Wiggum-Baldacchino tensions, culminating in their feel good marriage in 1900 and the birth of famed Hell-Fish member Ignatius Wiggum in 1921.

Iggy Wiggum was both the youngest JL Wiggum child (he had four sisters: Cassie, Sammy, Tilly and Taffy) and a Hell Fish member, as was perhaps his future wife, the smelly Denise Davis. They birthed their twins Clancy and Lucy in 1953. They both got murdered by The Cassadine mob in 1969, when Clancy and Lucy were sixteen.


End file.
